Why some men can’t find nice girls…

 

This is for the girls who have endured party after party in his presence, finally having realized that it wasn’t that he didn’t want a relationship: it was that he didn’t want you. I honor you for the night his dog died or his grandmother died or his little brother crashed his car and you held him, thinking that if you only comforted him just right, or said the right words, or rubbed his back in the right way then perhaps he’d realize what it was that he already had. This is for the night you realized that it would never happen, and the sunrise you saw the next morning after failing to sleep.

This is for the “I really like you, so let’s still be friends” comment after you read more into a situation than he ever intended; this is for never realizing that when you choose friends, you seldom choose those which make you cry yourself to sleep. This is for the hugs you’ve received from your female friends, for the nights they’ve reassured you that you are beautiful and intelligent and amazing and loyal and truly worthy of a great guy; this is for the despair you all felt as you sat in the aftermath of your tears, knowing that that night the only companionship you’d have was with a pillow and your teddy bear. This is for the girls who have been used and abused, who have endured what he was giving because at least he was giving something; this is for the stupidity of the nights we’ve believed that something was better than nothing, though his something was nothing we’d have ever wanted.

Men complain that they never meet nice girls, girls who are genuinely interested and compelling, who are intelligent and sweet and smart and beautiful; men despair that no good women want to share in their lives, that girls play mindgames, that girls love to keep them hanging. Yet, men, I ask you: were you to meet one of these genuinely interested, thrillingly compelling, interesting and intelligent and sweet and beautiful and smart girls, were you to give her your number and wait for her to call… and if you were to receive a call from her the next day and she, in her truthful, loyal, intelligent and straightforward nice girl fashion, were to tell you that she finds you intriguing and attractive and interesting and worth her time and perhaps material from which she could fashion a boyfriend, would you or would you not immediately call your friends to tell them of the “stalker chick” you’d met the night prior, who called you and wore her heart on her sleeve and told the truth? And would you, or would you not, refuse to make plans with her, speak with her, see her again, and once again return to the bar or club or party scene and search once more for this “nice girl” who you just cannot seem to find? Because therein lies the truth, guys: we nice girls are everywhere. But you’re not looking for a nice girl.

You don’t want the nice girl.. so don’t say you’re looking for a relationship: relationships take time and energy and intent, three things we’re willing to extend – – but in return, we’re looking for compassion and loyalty and trust, three things you never seem willing to express.

2 responses to “Why some men can’t find nice girls…

  1. I have just broke up with a nice girl. You are completely correct. I hope in the future I remember your thoughts and change my self.

  2. This is the problem with girls. They think to much. Instead of just going up to a guy they like, knowing that he’s single and breaking the ice, they’d rather smile, play with their hair, give you “the guy” the look, and mess with his head. For christ sake, do you know how easy it is for a girl to just go up to a guy and start talking and if she doesnt find him interesting, how easy it is for her to walk away. If you ” the girl” are giving a guy the look and he’s looking back and your both keeping an eye on eachother, HE WANTS TO TALK TO YOU!!!!! But once this game goes on for more then 15 mins the chance of him getting up and doing somthing about is slim. Cause she’s making him think to much. Hear is some advice to the girls out their that are NICE. If you think your so nice, the next time your interested in a guy, wherever it may be, just say hi. Cut the crap with stupid games. Lifes to short to just look and smile. I guarantee you if you just walk up to a guy after playing the staring game and say ” hi”, thats all you have to say and you’ll make things alot more easier and actually learn a thing or two about how to read a guy better by just looking at him by doing this over time.

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