So…I’m sure you were all wondering wtf was goin on w/ me and all my morose posts. Well, Saturday morning, Sunday afternoon, and Monday morning…when I was in Chicago…um…I kinda went thru Chicago’s phone and saw some texts that I shouldn’t have seen….or so I thought. I was so upset, but still kept my lady composure and didn’t say anything. I’m so afraid of confrontation it’s ridiculous! Instead, I cried the whole flight home…got wasty cakes the minute Kristee picked me up from the airport, then got home and got more wasty cakes w/ my brother, sister in law, cousin, and Cyn. We talked all night and discussed different aspects. Some ppl said I should just confront him, but I was so head strong on just ignoring him and just “bowing out gracefully.” The rest of the week was just a blur….he continued to text/im me and I continued to ignore….(I have to admit that his persistence really made me feel better). Finally, Friday came along and he text me in the morning and we talked it out. Apparently, he knew that I went thru his phone and he knew exactly why I was mad. He had valid explanations for everything. The way I see it, is if he didn’t really like me or didn’t really care and if I was just a number to him…then why would he even bother. Why would he introduce me to his whole family. It’s hard because we are both long distance…and we do have an “open relationship” I guess I should have asked him initially or better yet maybe not have even gone thru his phone. I know I’ve always said that I’m not going to let what the bastards in my past have done to me ruin my relationships w/ the person in my future. It’s just that I have been cheated on in EVERY relationship I have ever been in. It’s sooooo hard for me to trust. It’s just going to take alot of work and I’m glad he’s willing to explain and work things out with me. I’m learning….
Life as a Houston Social Butterfly
Houston Social Events, Hot Spots, and the daftness fo my life…
Life as a Houston Social Butterfly 
Trust is a very hard thing to learn. I think even the best of us get caught up in it sometimes. I wish you the best of luck going forward. In the end, if he’s worth it, time will tell.
Just caught your blog looking to see what other Houston blogs have going on…
but couldn’t help to not comment on this one.
Want to know where you stand with Chicago? Answer these questions:
1. Did you pay for the ticket or did he?
2.Are you in pictures together FRAMED in his house/apt?
3. Did he refer to you as his girlfriend to his friends AND family or introduce you by name and that you were visiting from Houston?
4. Did you go out with any of his friends and their girlfriends/wives/fiancee’s? or just him, or just him and some of his friends?
5. What would happen if you told him you were coming to visit 3 consecutive weekends?
My bet is that you are either a potential girlfriend who gets chances when you visit to convince him you are the one while he also tests it out with others, a side item (always nice for guys that a gal will fly in to “hang out” for a weekend with no other strings), a safety net (if he is a guy afraid of not always having somebody), or just a piece of ass.
Sounds to me like you caught him and he just put a good story together (would have been interesting if you had confronted him when he got out of the shower or whenever you snuck the peek and didn’t give him a week to figure out what was going on and how to handle it).
You have to communicate as not communicating breeds mistrust and also, gives the other person an “out”. Ask questions when needed so you don’t assume anything based on an ambiguous statement. “she hears what she wants to hear” is something that can happen when the guy “makes no promises”. Dunno… but for me, long distance relationships work best when the relationship started out healthy in the same vicinity. That way you know the person better and can better interpret emails/text/phone.
But really, if you want it to be exclusive, make it that way or move on. Don’t just go for an open relationship if thats not what you want.